Friday, February 28, 2014

Baby Essley: The Second Month


Month Two of Motherhood // Bubby and Bean

It's so cliche to say this, but holy crap has time flown by since this mini creature entered my life.  Today little Essley Morgan is officially two months old, which is just bananas to me.  It honestly does feel like just last week that I was in labor, equal parts excited and terrified, utterly clueless about motherhood.  And now here she is, quickly on her way to becoming a little girl with her own feisty personality.  And here I am, a mom - who had absolutely no idea what she was doing but somehow has been able to figure it out enough that her daughter is healthy and strong and growing.  Crazy.


On Essley's one month birthday, I shared both the good and bad parts of my first few weeks of motherhood, and I didn't sugarcoat the struggles.  I'm not going to get too into the challenges today, because for the most part, they haven't changed.  It's still really hard working full time with a newborn when your husband is out on the road for his job 75% of the time.  It's still exhausting and I'm still seriously sleep deprived.  But it has gotten exponentially easier with practice and lots of trial and error.  Essley is sleeping for longer stretches, which is huge.  And we've learned how to nurse in a way that creates less gas issues for her.  I've also become much more open to accepting offers for help.  Ess and I have gone to stay at my mom's a few weekends while Robbie's been gone which has been a lifesaver (meals prepared + extra sleep + help with laundry = gold to a new mom).  I'm adjusting to my new work routine too.  My work schedule is much less fluid than in the past, but I'm getting pretty good at putting down a project in the middle of it and being able to quickly pick up where I left off.  I'm also getting better at saying to no to projects that I simply don't have the extra time for anymore.  This is a big deal for me, because I'm a workaholic by nature and have often valued my own self-worth by the level of success in my career and/or amount of projects I'm able to juggle at any given time.  Although I have to continue to work full time because of boring adult things like bills, my priorities have definitely shifted career-wise (baby comes first, always), and I'm learning to accept that without feeling guilty.  In fact, everyday I'm more grateful for this major shift in my life.


As with the challenges of month number two, the rewards aren't much different either - they've just gotten greater.  The more natural things are beginning to feel with this baby in our lives, the more I've been able to appreciate every moment (even the ones that are filled with screaming, vomit, and/or poop).  Seeing her smile is just huge you guys.  I think if you'd told me a few months ago that seeing a baby smile could bring me to tears, I would have rolled my eyes.  But it does.  I was nursing her the other night, singing 'You Are My Sunshine' (because she is), and she unlatched while I was singing, looked me in eye, and broke into the biggest, gummiest little smile.  Tears instantly filled my eyes, I felt a lump in my throat, and my voice started to quiver.  I'm pretty sure that my heart was close to bursting - all because of a tiny smile.  It's also been so cool to get Essley together with friends' babies and to watch them react to one another.  She had her 'first date' with a baby boy named Jackson a couple of weeks ago, which was ridiculously adorable on every level.  She also got to go work with daddy, and meet up with about half a dozen other babies of band/crew members at the band's sound check when they played locally last weekend.  Hilariously, she slept through the entire check (I guess music runs through her veins enough that it naturally lulls her to sleep!), but it was the best feeling in the world to get her together with this little gang of future playmates.  As the days go on, she is more and more alert, interested, and involved.  Everyday is better than the last.  She is honestly the most amazing person I've ever known.


Just like last time, I could go on and on, but I'll spare you before things get out of hand.  (Side note: Although I might feel like it sometimes, I'm not the only person in the world who has had a new baby, and I will never be offended by readers who choose to skip over these excessive baby gushing posts.)  As much as I can't wrap my head around the fact that it's already been two months since Essley entered this world, I also can't quite remember life without her.  I love her and my little family more than I could ever put into words.  It hasn't been an easy adjustment by any means, yet it somehow feels completely natural. Everyday is better than the last.  Sincerely.  I can't wait to see what month three brings.


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19 comments:

  1. So happy for you that baby Essley is healthy and you've established a good routine! She looks adorable in the pink pompom hat :)

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  2. I feel the same way about baby smiles! After trying for about 10 minutes, my little one rolled over a couple weeks ago and I started crying, I thought it was the most amazing thing in the world.

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  3. I just love her cheeks! It's funny, even in the weekly photos you can tell she's getting more alert. At first she's just kind of flopped over the arm rest, but then suddenly she stays propped up!

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  4. She's really starting to look like Mommy! And that second photo is so cute with her pink hat :) Great Valentine too :)

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  5. I'm tearing up just reading this...I'm so happy for you! I can feel your happiness as I read your eloquent words about Essley. It brings me back to those precious times with my babies. Thanks for sharing such tenderness, it makes me feel closer. Love you!!!

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  6. Elizabeth FloerschFebruary 28, 2014 11:48 AM

    We're in week 2 of month 3 right now & it just keeps getting better & better. That gummy smile you wrote about - those get bigger & they won't stop melting your heart. I work full time, from home, so I am in a similar situation as you... & you're right: adjusting to baby & work life is tough, but it's doable & baby always comes first. Enjoy, Melissa!

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  7. Eeeep she's so cute!!! Such precious memories you're making. :-)

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  8. The hat with the two pompoms is very, very cute! Oh, and so is Essley :-)

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  9. That smile you talked about will continue to get even more incredible as she begins to giggle, then talk and more! The bond with your kid is something no one can ever truly understand til you have one yourself. Last night, I was leaving his room after saying our good-nights, and Kai, my little guy (age 3), asked me to "stay one more minute". I had already been in there a long time, read two stories, sang to him and cuddled with him... so I told him that he should go to bed. He looked at me and said in his tiny little voice, "but mama, you're my pwincess" :) Uh.. yea, call me a sucker, but I got right back into bed and cuddled with him til my heart calmed down enough to let him go again. :)
    p.s. she is gorgeous!!

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  10. This is just so adorable!!! I love these type of posts, they really make my day!

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  11. What a sweetie! A baby's smile can melt your heart.

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  12. She is so pretty. Happy 2 month birthday!

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  13. She's adorable, beautiful little girl!

    http://laurenslittleblogs.blogspot.co.uk/
    xx

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  14. Thanks for your comments everybody! It's nice to be able to share pieces of my life with this special little bean from time to home around here.

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  15. I love reading your posts Melissa, thanks for sharing and warm wishes to your beautiful family x

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  16. Seven weeks does not look happy! The hat is super cute, though. I agree with Paige that you can definitely see her becoming far more aware of the world around her.

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  17. She is a sweetie! I can remember how amazing it was that my mother-in-law flew out to help with both my girls when they were born, and I completely broke down into tears when she left! She was amazingly helpful, and I was so thankful for the extra help with dinner, laundry, diaper changes or even the occasional night feeding so I could sleep 4-5 hours straight. It is tough in the beginning, but by 2 -3 months it does get better (as you can see!) .... how amazing to get that tiny smile. It does make all the difference in the world

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  18. Wait wait wait wait! Not only is she delicious, your hub is in Umphrey's?!!!!!!! What?!

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  19. i love how her personality shines through in these photos. she is perfection!

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